Hurt

Hurt is the pain that eats away my heart and makes me see the real world through a filter of truth. The truth blinded by unseen obstacles of deception and greed. Hurt is being a part of something that forgets you. You forget yourself for others because of fear. Hurt is being taken for granted by a friend. Hurt is being afraid of the person you thought you could trust, you gave your heart and they break it into pieces. Hurt is having to wonder what might have been if pride didn't win. Hurt is betrayal and jealousy studded with doubt and fear of loosing. Hurt is seeing your face on a mirror in pain. Hurt is misplacing your trust. It is unreliable love and the absence of love, the confusion about whether or not love really exists.

It is constantly feeling inadequate even when you know you're more deserving and you are blamed for something you didn't do. Hurt is knowing that your best isn't good enough and knowing that you have more than you really need and knowing that you wouldn't feel better even if you gave it all away. Hurt is the harsh word in response to a friendly gesture, the failure to acknowledge a favor, the injustice that goes unnoticed. Hurt is the inability to communicate. HUrt is being a puppet to someone who controls everything you have. Hurt is not being able to defend oneself, it is mute, not being able to say what really hurts. Hurt is staying at some point you wished it never existed
Hurt is the question that has no answer and the answer to a question that will never be asked.
Hurt is happiness taken away intentionally leaving me with less than enough of what i need. The kind of Happiness that only happens once in a lifetime. Hurt is the closeness tainted with too much pain and pride, too strangled to let go.

Hurt will be the thing in the past I don't want it.

Do I ever get tired of this? Yes I am tired!
I really abhor people wearing masks.my nerves are on a high today. They tend to appear very kind on the outside but on the inside they creep me out.

Stop hurting me... so that I can stop saving what's left behind. Hurt is you... And I am quitting you.

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This is goodbye to the hurtful past that i am referring to. I need to have a new life,and a new ME. This is just the beginning.